Like a slap in the face.

    The reality of not being able for my husband and I to just start "trying" to get pregnant is the harshest reality for us. Our ability to add to our family is literally dependent on so many outside and uncontrollable factors. So how do couples deal with this, how do they cope, how does one sit by and watch friends and family announce pregnancies and not become bitter....

    These questions have been nagging at me for the 2 years since my sudden and much needed hysterectomy. A slew of emotions have come and gone through these 2 years. I wanted another child, and wasn't willing to let it come in God's time. I wanted life to happen on my own terms and in my own time. It felt like the harder I pushed my sweetheart and God, the more resistance I was met with. I kept telling friends it was going to happen soon, because in my mind it HAD TO. In my mind, my heart "couldn't handle" much more time passing.

    It was finally in the moment that I talked to the 2 people I was leaving in the dust (God, and My husband), that the path we were always meant to travel became oh so clear. Surrogacy.

    So how do couples deal with infertility?..
    How do we cope?..
    How do we sit by and watch others have children while we struggle and wait?..

    The answer came to me after I gave up my ideas and turned it over the My Father.

   FAITH!

    Like a slap in the face. The simple answer I have been taught all my life. Faith in God, and in his plan for me as His child. I do not think that means I will never be sad, frustrated or emotional about this adventure we have set down. It does mean that I will never doubt again that what is meant to be will be. As long as I keep counseling with Him and praying each step of the way, I know God will make us whole.

    I want to keep this blog as a memoir for myself and my children. I also hope this blog can help be informative to someone else who is looking at the possibility of Surrogacy to complete their forever family.